Wednesday, October 17, 2012

My First Criminal Minds Fan Fic!

Hey everyone. It's been a long time since I've posted on this site being that I started up the new Video Roulette blog recently.

But now that I have something to add I figure it's about time to come back for another post.

Very recently, as in I JUST got back, I was with my parents spending sometime with my brother. Today he is officially beginning his training to be in the Army National Guard. We are all so proud of him.

Though, being the dork I am, I took my laptop with me on this trip. However, there was apparently NO internet connection. My internet addiction was just going to wait for 2 1/2 days. Despite this set back, it gave me ample time, when I wasn't spending it with my family, to work on my latest addiction.

I have gotten hooked on Criminal Minds ever since I first saw it. In my utter geekery, I decided to undertake my first TV fan fiction about Criminal Minds.

I completed the entirety of the story at my brother's home and finished the touch up after I got home. So for your viewing pleasure, I will be posting a chapter at a time of my Criminal Minds fan fiction. For those that would want to read more before I have finished posting it all here I will also be posting it on FanFiction.com under my Twitter and blog name Creative Karma at http://www.fanfiction.net/~creativekarma.

Without further adieu, here it comes.


“A Loaded Smile”
~Set in Little Rock, Arkansas~
By Creative Karma


Prologue
                                                       Little Rock, Arkansas

            It’s a typical Friday night on the streets of downtown Little Rock. The sidewalks are packed with laughing couples and groups. The bars and restaurants are full to capacity with a line out the door. The lights and sights keep the wandering eye busy and away from the alleyways that look darker beyond the harsh lights.
            A big group comes walking out of a local restaurant only a block over from the waterfront. A few men carry the air of a bodyguard like a shield looking ever vigilant in their duties.
            The crowd outside the restaurant was not merely those waiting to be let inside, although some of them were. Some of the crowd began to cheer and shout as the group poured out onto the sidewalk.
            For a moment the bodyguards parted and spread out to block the onslaught, revealing whom they were protecting. It was the young and wildly famous recording artist Adam Lambert and Sauli Koskinen out for a night on the town together.
            Adam was leading the way. His normally black hair had been dyed blonde and cut short on the sides and long on the top. Enough hair to artfully sculpt into a fashionable and thick mowhawk-esque hair. Although, his black brows remained dark as they arched over his pale blue eyes. He adjusted the black leather jacket over his torso under which he wore a pale grey t-shirt with a medium grey graphic design. The shirt and jacket fell loosely over his waist only giving glimpses of the black belt that was looped though a pair of medium grey jeans. His black boots were covered down to his ankles by his grey jeans.
            His boyfriend Sauli was following right behind him laughing about something Adam had said. Sauli had dirty blonde hair that was styled very much like Adam’s now was save for the fact it was shorter on top. His light blue eyes shined in the flashing lights of the nearby cameras. He too was wearing a black leather jacket under which he wore a plain black t-shirt. The jeans he wore were so faded they appeared to be white to those around them and were tucked into a pair of loosely tied, black army boots.
            The crush of the crowd and the flashing lights of the cameras drew many eyes in their direction as they waited at the curb for their black SUV to be pulled up to the building. They talked and acted as if they were the only ones on the sidewalk and it was any other normal night.
            However, the bodyguards were beginning to have a harder time holding the crowd back as the limo pulled up to the curb. It was as if the crowd was fighting to be noticed just once before they pulled away. For some, it might be their only chance to see them out in public here. The paparazzi furiously snapped photos of everything.
            Adam pulled out his wallet to give a tip to the staff outside despite the fact he had not used the valet service.
            It was at that moment, the crush overwhelmed even the bodyguard’s determined efforts. A man in ragged clothing shot out of the mass of people snagging the wallet before making a run for it. The man’s clothes were dirty from who knows what. It was hard to determine under the lights hanging over the sidewalk that his shirt was once a forest green t-shirt that hung large over his malnourished frame. His baggy grey sweat pants only hung on by the saving grace of an elastic waist. But his black tennis shoes looked like they would fall apart at any moment on the chase.
            One of the bodyguards started to give chase while the other fought to maintain control of the crowd.
            A figure emerged, from an alleyway only yards from the commotion. The figure’s face appeared to be a young woman from the long yet dirty brunette hair. A pair of black, rectangular glasses framed her hazel eyes. Yet, the clothing was baggy and used enough to hide the rest of her form. The shirt was a tank black tank top while the bottoms appeared to be much handed down jeans with rips in the knees. Her white tennis shoes, however, looked much newer than the man running down the sidewalk. She too appeared to be homeless.
            However, instead of staying out of the way of the coming commotion, she ran faster than seemed possible and tackled the homeless man to the ground. Despite the man’s height and build, the managed to simply keep him from getting up rather than trying to wrestle the wallet from him.
            Soon, the bodyguard that had given chase arrived and took hold of the man allowing the young woman to rise from her place. She brushed her hair away from her face but stayed kneeling. Her voice came sounding rather reasonable.
            “Don’t hurt him. He’s just hungry,” she begged the bodyguard.
            “Thanks for stopping him but now this guy is mine. It’s up to the owner of the wallet if he doesn’t want to press charges,” the bodyguard replied.
            The young woman was about to say more when she heard noise rushing their direction.
            Now, the paparazzi had a new target as they snapped pictures of the trio.
            She was not used to the glare and brought up her hands to try and block some of the light. The glass flashed in the light of the camera flashes. Her ears were being assaulted with questions as they all drew in close.
            The bodyguard was now torn between getting possession of the wallet, holding onto the would-be thief and the onslaught of the media.
            More footsteps were heard that turned some of the attention away from the trio knelt down on the ground. Adam and Sauli had come to see what had happened making the photographers go wild with their cameras.
            Adam looked to the bodyguard holding onto the man on the ground.
            “What happened?” he asked.
            “This is the guy that stole your wallet. While I was chasing him, this girl came out of nowhere and tackled him. She stopped him and held him down till I caught up,” the bodyguard made motions to the young woman and the guy in all the right places.
            This had the frenzy started once again by the paparazzi, leaving the girl slowly rising to her feet feeling unsteady and uncomfortable with all the scrutiny.
            The bodyguard yanked the wallet out of the man’s hand and handed it over to Adam who took it slowly as he took in the young homeless woman that had apparently helped out.
            He was about to speak as the young woman’s soft but intelligent tone started up.
            “Please sir, Gary here…he was just hungry. He’s only been on the streets a few weeks and hasn’t been able to adjust yet. He just needs some help,” the young woman said.
            Adam listened quietly to the young woman before looking to Sauli for a moment. After a bit of unspoken communication, he looked back to the young woman.
            “What’s your name?” Adam asked.
            She looked around at the photographers for a moment with a concerned expression before looking back to Adam.
            “Catherine….” She hesitated a moment as if she was going to give a last name but then she stopped herself and left it at that.
            Adam nodded and looked to the bodyguard.
            “Let him up.”
            The bodyguard looked confused but got off the man slowly who quickly moved away from the bodyguard and Catherine before getting up. He looked scared and confused.
            Adam slowly stepped towards him as he spoke.
            “It’s all right. I’m not going to press charges. Here…” Adam opened his wallet and handed Gary ten dollars.
            Gary looked to the money then back to Adam. He quickly took the money and hurried off pushing his way through the crowd to get away.
            Adam watched him leave and then looked back to Catherine. He reached back into his wallet and pulled out a twenty dollar bill and held it out to her.
            Catherine shook her head and said, “I can’t take that. Anyone would’ve done the same thing. I’d rather work for the money I receive.”
            A smile crossed his lips and he still held the money out to her as he walked closer.
            “Think of it as a reward if you had found a wallet and turned it into the police. You have worked for it and not everyone would have helped. Let alone someone who is in the same situation.”
            Catherine looked over his face for a moment before slowly taking the money.
            ‘Thanks…”
            Adam smiled fully now.
            “You’re welcome. You take care of yourself, the best you can.”
            She softly smiled as she responded, “I’ll try.”
As Adam and Sauli walked away from Catherine taking the majority of the paparazzi with them, none of them seemed aware of a figure watching all of this from across the street.


Early the next morning, a garbage crew was making their rounds through the streets gathering up garbage bags and tossing them into the truck. The pair were wearing regular street clothes but had added heavy duty boots, an orange vest with reflecting patches sewn on.
“I tell you something man. One of these days, I’m gonna hook a better job than trash duty,” one man said as he tossed bags over to his partner.
“Oh really? With all that experience of yours what job you think you’re gonna get?” his co-worker chuckled.
Not hearing a response, he looked over to the frozen form of his co-worker.
“Dude, you all right? What’s the hold up?”
“We’re gonna need the police here. Call it in over the radio.”
The co-worker hopped off the back of the truck and came over.
“What is it now…?” He stopped in mid-sentence as he stood next to his buddy and looked down upon the bloody and mutilated corpse of Gary.


            In Quantico, the Behavioral Analysis Unit was looking up at the screen showing a photo of Gary’s body.
            “This is Gary Sanders. Age 32. He was found dead in an alley way in Little Rock, Arkansas just yesterday,” Penelope Garcia said as she looked to the others. Her fiery red hair was pulled back from her somewhat pale face with colorful hair clips. She had added colorful makeup to add brightness to her skin tone. Her bright green glasses framed her deep blue eyes. Her clothing was just as colorful with frills around the collar. She wore red heels on her feet. The pen she was motioning with was bright pink with a fuzzy ball on the top.
            “Who found the body?” asked Derek Morgan. He was bald but his eye brows were thick and black where they arched over his dark brown eyes. His skin tone was the darkness of the African-American ethnicity. She wore a simple dark grey t-shirt that was tucked into black slacks with a black belt. Black dressy boots completed the look.
            “That would be Eric Hutchinson and his co-worker Steve Calloway. They were loading the garbage truck early yesterday morning and discovered his body,” Garcia replied.
            “What brings this under our jurisdiction?” David Rossi asked as he looked to Garcia with his brown eyes. Rossi was an older Caucasian man with black hair cut in a very short style that left a little volume on the top. He was slowly graying throughout and his sideburns faded from black to grey as the hair moved away from the top of his head.
            Rossi wore a little more business causal look of a black suit jacket buttoned over a white collared shirt that had the top buttoned undone. His black slacks were an exact match to his jacket and his black dress shoes were shined.
            Jennifer Jareau sat forward and opened up her file. “The chief of police called me on this one. No only is this not the first murder of a homeless person within the city limits over the past couple of years but it is supposedly linked to the other because of the removal of a body part.” J.J. was the liaison for the BAU. Her long blonde hair was only half pulled back into a black hair clip leaving the rest to hang loose down her back. Her light blue eyes looked over the team that stood out against her smooth Caucasian complexion. She dressed like the proverbial secretary with dark grey suit jacket, white blouse, matching grey pencil skirt and black heels.
            “Correct, more specifically his hands,” Garcia added moving to the next picture on the screen of Gary Sanders arms sans hands.
            “Why take his hands?” Morgan asked aloud.
            “Could be a trophy. Something to remember and relive the thrill by,” Spencer Reid offered as a possible solution. Spencer looked more the part of a student rather than an FBI agent. A dark brown sweater vest was pulled over a white button-down shirt that held a soft blue pinstripe pattern. A brown tie was cinched around his neck but tucked down into his vest. The vest fell over the brown dress pants he wore. His brown eyes looked over the team.
            “You said that this fit the other vics because of the removal of a body part?” Rossi said with a questioning tilt to his voice.
            “According to the past records of these murders, each victim had some body part removed. Only one other time it was their hands, before that the eyes, and before that the tongue,” Garcia answered.
            “How many other murders fitting this description have there been?” Aaron Hotchner asked with his dark brown eyes focused on the pictures on the screen. He was the leader of the BAU section of the FBI. His black suit was pressed and the collar of his white button down shirt was starched. It was buttoned all the way up and a black tie had been added. His black suit pants and black dress shoes gave the most typical image of an FBI agent. His dark brown hair was cut short and well maintained.
            “According to the chief of police, this makes seven within the past two years.”
            “The chief wants whoever this is caught now before another dead body shows up,” J.J. added.
            “Considering the lack of timeline we need to assume that at any moment another murder might be committed. Either in the next 24 hours or a few days from now. If we want to get ahead of this killer we will have to get there as soon as possible. Pack up everyone, we leave in twenty.” Hotchner said as he rose from his chair.

Tuesday, March 13, 2012

Anti-Protest Law Or Protecting the Nation?


            Many people are quite familiar with Occupy Nashville campaign that has been going on for some time now. Occupy Nashville, according to their website  occupynashville.org, “is a citizen-led movement defending Democracy from corporate money and corruption. Our goals are: 1) Remove money from politics. 2)  End corporate personhood. 3) Support the Occupy Wall Street movement.”

            Occupy Nashville is receiving local and national news coverage in every form of that media. The sight of people living in tents at Legislative Plaza has been a common sight for those that pass by there on a daily basis. While some show their support for what Occupy Nashville is about, there are others looking to end the occupation as soon as possible.

            As reported by Tom Carter at 2012indyinfo.com, the US House of Representatives and the Senate passed a bill that would make it a felony to participate in such protests as Occupy Nashville. The bill called H.R. 347 or the “Federal Restricted Buildings and Grounds Improvement Act of 2011” is vaguely worded as to make it a criminal offense to remain or enter in an area designated as restricted.

          While such a bill might seem like common sense as to not enter a restricted area, this bill has been used as a means to try and clear out the protestors that were peacefully camping out at Legislative Plaza. Currently, Governor Bill Haslam has been trying to prevent this law from being a warrant to arrest everyone that is camping out for Occupy Nashville.

              A press release from the Occupy Nashville site documents the eviction. According to the press release: “At approximately 3:50 am, March 12, approximately 30 Tennessee Highway Patrol officers moved onto Legislative Plaza and evicted the last tent remaining of the Occupy Nashville encampment, ending one of the longest standing 24/7 occupy camps in the country.”

           Now, while this bill has passed preventing Occupy Nashville from physically living in tents at Legislative Plaza, the people of Occupy Nashville have all ready recovered some of the property taken by the police and have re-set up an information table there at Legislative Plaza. The site continues to state that general assemblies will still be held in the plaza Tuesday and Thursday nights at 7 p.m. and 1 p.m. on Saturday and Sunday.

            For more information about Occupy Nashville, their website is OccupyNashville.org and for information on the H.R. 347 bill it can be found at 2012IndyNews.com under the General News tab.

Friday, February 10, 2012

Speaking Up


Hey everyone, welcome to Creative Karma’s Notepad. I’m Creative Karma.

It’s been a while since I’ve updated my blog here. Mostly because real life is a real drag when it comes to writing. Having the time to write and coming up with something to write makes everything harder than it should be.

However, I was talking to my good friend TheCinemaChick and she offered up a great idea that we could both do. I decided to give the idea a try because of the opportunity it would give me.

The idea she brought up came from the movie We Bought a Zoo. It was a quote by one of the characters named Benjamin Mee who said: “You know, sometimes all you need is twenty seconds of insane courage. Just literally twenty seconds of just embarrassing bravery. And I promise you, something great will come of it.”

So this post is going to be my twenty seconds of insane courage to say things I’ve always wanted to say but never had the courage to say to anyone in the hopes that something great will come of it.

One of the biggest things I’ve kept bottled up over the years is my utter distaste for the way society treats the human form, women, and those with disabilities.

The media makes everyone try to believe that if you don’t have skin the color of an animal hide, are super tall and skinny, and plastic surgery to make you look like a teenager for life then something is extremely wrong with you and you need to go out and fix it. Now!

I think that’s a load of crap but everyone is buying into it. It’s gotten so far that I even have certain people around me saying that as I’m looking for a job that I might want to apply for a secretarial job because they are only going to pick some hot woman with long legs, thin body, and drop dead gorgeous. I’m sick of this crap. I completely understand looking your very best when you are looking for a job or working a 9 to 5 job. However, not hiring someone simply because they aren’t supermodel hot is, I think, just as bad as not hiring someone because of a possible disability.

With the way the economy is lately, only the super rich have enough money to put that much effort into their appearance while everyone is scrambling for the mediocre jobs that barely offer enough money to live on let alone pay for the beautifying extras.

No one should ever be made to feel like they are less of a person because they are pot marked, covered in stretch marks, deformed, overweight, or any other number of things. Just because they don’t look like a supermodel doesn’t mean that they don’t have feelings and a heart that breaks. I’m one of those people. And I’m just as deserving as anyone else to have any job that I’m qualified for or to love whoever I want and not to be ashamed of what I look like.

And if you have a disability then there’s nothing wrong with that either. I will proudly admit that a couple years ago I was diagnosed with Asperger’s Syndrome. I’m not ashamed of having a disability. For those of you that don’t know what that means, AS is commonly known under the term of a high functioning autistic person. People who have this syndrome are not easy to spot most of the time because sometimes they just don’t like the texture of certain foods or they don’t like wearing any clothing made of wool. Other times it’s really noticeable like people who don’t notice social cues like when they’ve been rambling on and don’t know the people around them are telling them to stop. Or those people who are sensitive to lights or those who say things that are offensive and they have no clue that they did so.

People with AS are just as capable as anyone else to function in a day to day working environment. They can handle multiple tasks, they can follow directions, they can climb the proverbial ladder and be in a management position. They only have to function in a different way. They have to write a list of the things expected of them. They might have to ask for their manager to wait while they write down the next few tasks they need to do. Heck, they might even need to ask a few questions to clarify a statement because it didn’t make sense to them.

I could go on and on about this topic since I live with it everyday. No one would ever know that I have it unless I said so or unless I had an off day and some of the signs of that disability came to the surface. But that’s just why I talk about it. I want people to know what to expect of me just as much as I want to know what to expect of the people I might be working for or with or hanging around with on a daily basis.

I believe wholeheartedly that if people weren’t so friggin scared of what everyone might think of them then they’d be more open about what they thought and how they see the world. The very least that would come out of that kind of communication would be people seeing the side of another person that they would have never known was there. A level of understanding that allows people to truly be comfortable with one another and stop worrying about the shoulda, coulda, wouldas and simply enjoy learning about the people around them.

This is the very problem I’m having with two people in my life right now. For this post they will be known as Annie and Valerie. They have the same problem but in slightly different ways and at different intensity levels.

Annie was one of the very best people to be around. She was fun and quirky and loved goofing off with everyone. She had fun and didn’t care what people thought about her. However, once she got settled back into a life with the people from her hometown she began to change. Suddenly, things like what people thought were very important. They formed her identity and changed who she was as a person. Soon she started to look down on others who didn’t live like she lived. I realize that I called her Annie because she is like that namesake play. A girl who wants the world to be the perfect white picked fence where everything is good and happy and everyone does things for her. Where the world is all about her. While the Annie in the play isn’t selfish by any means and just wants help, the Annie I speak of takes the notion of the play being all about Annie and her struggles and runs with it. If it’s not about her then it’s no longer important. She doesn’t really care to learn about the things around her.

Valerie, on the other hand, reads all the books on the subject she needs to know about, she goes to all the most prominent people to try and get all of the facts straight. However, the problem comes around when she’s forced to listen to the people closest to her. When the people around her try to explain how things work for them and how her reactions to them aren’t helping she doesn’t believe them. If her family tried to really talk to her and explain things, she believes she knows everything on the subject and how to handle it. It’s like the definition of insanity: doing the same action over and over again and expecting different results. Its makes it feel like the world must cater to her opinion on things and do it her way.

I have a couple of things to say to these two people.

Annie. The world isn’t Leave It To Beaver Land. Once you have to live on your own people are going to curse, bash your religion and your personal beliefs and not care how it makes you feel. People are going to smoke in the same area you try to eat lunch or dinner and they won’t give a flip if it upsets you. They are going to drink alcohol but they aren’t necessarily going to be alcoholics because they have one or two beers a day. Going to clubs doesn’t mean you have to drink anything you don’t want to. Also, having a closed mind about other people’s religions make you seem like a zealot who believes that everyone that doesn’t believe exactly how you do is going to hell. Those very people that you are putting down are not going to thank you for trying to set them straight and more often than not will immediately disassociate themselves from you as a friend because if you are going to be that inflexible on that topic then what else are you going to be inflexible on?

Valerie. Just because you read every book on the subject and talk to specialists doesn’t mean you know it all. Everything affects everyone in a different way. No one person is ever going to understand things the exact same way at the exact same time. If you are told by countless doctors and such that the people in your life are doing just fine then you need to learn to let go and let those people come to you when they need you. You need to put trust in them that they can figure out how to run their lives in the manner that works for them and makes them profitable to society. You also need to trust that if they need help from someone like you that they will come to you because they know you have the experience and they respect your opinion. Until the day comes that they ask for your help and advice then you have to learn how to watch from the sidelines and cheer them on because they are someone that you want to succeed in life and to be happy.

So there it is. My twenty seconds of insane courage. I don’t really expect the people I’m writing about to read this post. Even if they do it’s something they should know about themselves and how they are affecting the lives of those they love and those they interact with on a daily basis.

If you have it in you to express yourself for twenty seconds I encourage you to speak up. Say those things that have always been on your mind that you couldn’t manage to speak of before. Open yourself up to the possibility that someone in the world will read what you have a say and it will make a difference in their life. No matter how small the difference.

Before I close out this post I want to say one last thing to my dear friend that I will called Kitteh, she knows who she is. You are so my long lost sister and I’d do anything to have more time with you in person than maybe a couple of days every couple of years. You can kidnap me anytime and we can hit up the movies and then our fave burrito place and chat the night away.

Well, that’s all from this little experiment. I leave you with the knowledge that yes you can make a difference if you just speak up.

This is Creative Karma and I’m speaking up.

Wednesday, January 18, 2012

Going Black

Hey everyone, Creative Karma here.


This post is going to be a little different than the rest of my usual fare because things are coming up in our government that need to be focused on.


Many of you might have all ready heard of the possible new legislative acts named SOPAand PIPA that are trying to be passed into law. If you haven't, it's about time to wake up and pick up a newspaper or check out a website.


There are numerous sites and pages dedicated to talking about these two pieces of legislation. More than enough to understand what they are and what could happen if these new bills pass. And before I go any further I will say this: This site is purely dedicated to my opinion on things based on things I have heard and heard. Anything I say on this subject is based purely on the things I've read and heard about the legislation.


Now, to give a brief intro here, SOPA and PIPA are pretty much the exact same bill save for a change in words and things that are added or not there in the other bill. In short, these two bills are the collective idea and suggestion for how to stop internet piracy of American products such as movies, songs, games and so on.


Of course, this idea is a great one in theory. But then so is a lot of things in a perfect world.


Why don't I support these bills?


It's really quite simple.


These bills give ultimate power to artists or authors or companies that believe someone has stolen (aka being guilty of copyright infringement) to take that person to court to either sue the person or company and/or force the site to shut down or to remove/block that copyrighted item from their site.


While in a perfect world this is a great idea for making sure people aren't committing the internet version of shoplifting, this isn't a perfect world. It's very likely that some companies will use this power without mercy against even the slightest of offenders.


Imagine with me if you will. Imagine video taping your child walking for the first time. Cute right? I know it's adorable. Then, let's say you have music you have on your computer whether you bought it on line or in a store and you set this cute video of your kid up onYoutube with that music in the back ground or added to the video when you edited it.


Nothing wrong with that right?


Well, if these bills pass, there is a good chance that a company might go to the owners ofYoutube and try to take them to court if they don't remove or block the video from their website because the song itself is under copyright and people could download the video and steal the song.


So now that cute video of your kid gets removed from the video sharing site because you decided to play music during the video.


It might seem very far fetched but there is a possibility that companies may take it too far in the name of protecting their clients.


To me this is cutting the line far too close to taking away our right to freedom of speech. If it's not then it's really splitting hairs very closely.


I would gladly support these bills if the government would put restrictions on the companies and how much power they'd have over what is bannable and what is not. Yes, I created a new word there.


If the government could make sure that those people that are truly stealing music, images, videos and the like are the ones being targeted and not the little people that are simply posting things like videos of their kids or syncing music they bought up to a game they are playing that they are paying for anyway. It's that second group of people who aren't purposely committing copyright infringement but sharing their likes and dislikes and hobbies with friends and family.


Until the government can make that kind of promise, I'm against SOPA and PIPA.


I personally don't want to see the day that I can't review books and show things like the cover art for the book because that'd be copyright infringement or the day when my friendTheCinemaChick has to shut down her site because she reviews movies and sometime places clips of movies on the site. I don't want to see the day where people like That Guy With The Glasses team can no longer maintain a website because they show clips of movies and books and comics and games during their reviews. I don't want to see that happen to anyone who is only expressing their opinion on a certain subject manner.


So, along with many other websites and the like I'm supporting black out day which is January 18th. This post may be getting posted in the morning of said date but I support it just the same. This same message will be posted on my other sites as well. This is because, while I may be an artist and a writer and want my works to be protected I don't want that at the expense of freedom of speech. I want people to show pictures I've drawn and make commentary on them. I want to one day have someone showing clips from a movie of a screen play I wrote. I want that because it only serves to spread my works out to everyone. To have them noticed by everyone and get me noticed and appreciated by people who need inspiration or like the way I think.


This is Creative Karma and I'm blacking out.

Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Freedom Revealed

Hello everyone. Long time no see.

Lately, I have been completely distracted by real life and all the things going on that I've barely had time to write anything. However, I've managed to finally get something new done.

Tonight, well...I guess it's sorta tomorrow all ready... Anyway, I will get to reveal a short story I've been working on. This all came about because of a great friend of mine. She is my inspiration for this project and I owe her my thanks for helping kick start my mind.

This short story also falls into the category of a fan fiction. The story itself shows a brief moment into the life of a vampire character I created named Nicole. I decided to turn this into a fan-fiction by adding the character Jasper Hale into my story. He's been a favorite of mine since the beginning and I really wanted his type of element in my story.

Later, this short story will be modified to fit into the full length novel I'm working on about Nicole's life. Since that story is going to be completely original Jasper will be traded out. But, until that time, I give you my Twilight fanfic short story.


Freedom Revealed
A Twi-fic short by Nikki

1

            I looked at the crowded streets around me. My dark red eyes easily picked up the various people passing under one street lamp and the next to reach their destinations. The night had settled onto the city of Chicago and whole new breeds of humans were walking about the sidewalks. True, there were the fine upstanding citizens that were merely out for a night on the town with their friends or loved ones. Yet, there were others that inhabited street corners and darkened alley ways. Of course, it was the 1920s. It was the age of the speakeasy and the classic gangster.
            For years, things had been working up to this. The world had been racing to this era like it needed it to survive. I had been wandering this Earth for forty-seven years now and everything moved faster and faster. Though, I did not look one bit of those forty-three years.
            How was this possible you might wonder?
            This I will tell you briefly.
            I was born on the twenty-third of September in 1878 as Nicole Ann Fisher. However, through a series of events I came to discover one crucial fact. Vampires exist. Due to those very circumstances, I was soon one of them. I was made so by the leader of our group named Jared. For years, he and his group trained me in the ways of being a vampire. They showed me the life that I never knew or dreamed could exist. This very group of vampires, myself included, moved around through the decades changing our names as needed.
            For this current year, Jared brought our group to Chicago having heard many rumors of underground activities. Such things are havens to those like us who have to remain hidden and unheard of through the passing ages.
            Jared was currently the owner of a small jazz club that was a secret front for a speakeasy. Yet, more often than not, various patrons who entered the little speakeasy in the back were never seen or heard from again.
            But I am getting ahead of myself.
            The year is 1921. I would specify the month and day however it is only the years that matter to a vampire. You have to be wary of the changing eras. A vampire must always keep up with the changes in style and ways of thinking.
            My always wandered like this when I was doing my job. I was waiting for the usual signal. It was my job to gather certain monetary funds from the various businesses and families to which Jared granted protection and services. This became my job, even though I was not a human as they had used in the past, primarily because of my nationality at the time I was turned.
            From my mother’s side of the family, I gained the rich and dark skin of her native Cherokee tribe. Even though my skin had been paled by the act of becoming a vampire, I retained more color than other vampires giving me a look that allowed me to pass as a human to all the mortal eyes.
            I gently tugged at the dark turquoise blue hat that fit over my raven black hair that had been cut into a bob to match the times. A part of me still mourned the loss of my long hair that I had cherished as a child. Yet, I knew it could be grown back with Jared’s assistance. The hat matched the blue flapper dress I wore under a white jacket. This was so primarily since I was playing the part of a young girl simply strolling around town. I sincerely appreciated the simple fact that our business was done mostly outside and at nighttime. I was never fond of the very short hem lines up to the knee, the lack of a sleeve and the dip in the collar giving any man a view. My slim legs were encased in the stockings that had become so much a part of the look that it seemed unfinished without it. A simple pair of black pumps completed my look.
            I was nearly about to walk into the establishment myself when I finally saw the signal that they were ready.
            A young man stepped out alone onto the sidewalk. He leaned against a nearby light post, ignoring the passersby and those entering the jazz club as he lit a cigarette. It was a nasty habit; however, it was something easy to spot.
            I slowly rose from my seat outside of a closed café and carefully headed across the street to avoid being run over by the various motorcars traveling up and down the road. My eyes never moved to the individual smoking. After all, it was not him I had business with.
            As I entered the establishment, I placed a smile on my face to match the other merry makers. However, my goal was not simple merriment as I headed over to a man sitting at a table near a wall. My smile and demeanor would suggest I was his date.
            “Well, there you are. I am surprised anyone can be found in this place. It is really jumpin,” I said full of faked merriment. I removed my jacket and slipped it over one arm. The dress served its usual purpose, to disarm whatever thug they had brought in for the job.
            The thug in his chair looked me over in surprise. It took him a while to remember what he was supposed to be doing.
            “Hey Pauline wondered when you’d be gettin’ here,” he said once he regained a portion of his wits.
            I smiled slyly as I slowly settled into a chair across from him. Carefully and pointedly, I crossed one hose clad leg over the other.
            “It took me a little longer than usual to get in tonight.” The layers of insinuation started to build with each sentence.
            “Yeah, the boss is gettin’ up tight about the way things have been goin lately.”
            I slowly leaned in closer. A playful smile on my lips reddened with lipstick that glistened in the lights of the club. However, the tone of my voice dropping to its low warning tone that no one else would hear over the music and chatter.
            “If the boss has any problems with the situation, then he should come along with me and explain to my boss why he feels the way he does about the arrangement. Then again, if he does, you guys might be picking out a new leader for your little band of misfits.” I laughed coyly to keep things looking light before speaking again. “I suggest we head on into the back and do business as usual before my boss starts wondering where I am. He does not like sending someone out to look for me.”
            I slowly leaned back into my chair and watched his face across the table. I watched as my word caught hold of something in his mind. He was new at the business and thought he was a tough guy. Maybe he thought the rumors his buddies had told him were just talk, until now that is.
            He took a slow sip of his drink on the table before nodding to me. Slowly, he rose from the table looking a bit shaky. My words really had shaken the boy up. Part of me wished I had been lying, but that is just the way things were when you did business with Jared.
            I rose from my seat slowly and followed the thug behind a curtain that most people thought was a decoration when it really hid the passageway to the establishment’s second business. They ran a speakeasy just the same as Jared. Except theirs was for humans. This was the price they paid for running their business in Jared’s neck of the woods. True, they could have run to the cops but what would they say? They were being extorted for money to keep their speakeasy under wraps? Then again, the better reason for not trying to pull things on Jared is because Jared knew how to make people disappear. Of course, they’d reappear eventually on their doorstep, piece by piece.
            The thug led the way through the hidden bar to the manager’s door and knocked on it.
            “Enter,” the voice on the other side of the door said.
            The thug opened the door and instead of walking in looked to me nervously.
            I looked up at him expressionless before simply turning and heading into the office. My eyes took in the man behind the large desk and the oversized chair. A guy trying to play king of the castle. It was rather pathetic. He did not have a chance in the world.
            He finally looked up to me as the door closed. His brown eyes widened in surprise.
            “Oh, did not expect to see me tonight? This is the usual night for my pickup from your business. Or rather, did you think I would merely walk away at the suggestion that you did not feel like paying anymore?” My faked act fell away like a sheet. No need to pretend here that I was anything other than what I was.
            “No…no, of course not. I merely thought that…”
            I interrupted him. “That is just it. You were thinking that Jared would let you off the hook. You feel that with your business picking up that you want to keep all the profits for yourself. Trust me, Mr. O’Connell, men have tried and failed to do the very same thing. Why not prevent the repeat of history and simply pay what you owe?”
            Mr. O’Connell sat back in his chair and seemed to really be thinking on my words. He was scared, I knew it. I could smell it. It was a very distinctive smell. One I had smelled far too often. He gave in as moved to pull out a nearby drawer. His hand moved inside and placed a large envelope on the counter.
            I pulled my jacket on as I walked up to his desk. My petite hand reached out for the envelope. However, I felt movement behind me. Well, they were about to be surprised.
            Before they could even think that they were going to walk away clean, I made my move. I did not even have to think about it anymore.
            I dodged the thrust of the thug with his knife meant to catch me in my back. Stupid man thinking I would go down easy. About the time I snapped that same arm, he realized the mistake of believing in the packaging. I scooped up the knife before it hit the ground and in one swipe I sliced through his neck like butter.
            This man’s death took only seconds for me. It took longer for him to drop to the floor dead and start bleeding his life blood out on the floor.
            Slowly, I turned back around to face the man in charge of the operation with the bloody knife still in my hand.
            “Foolish mistake on your part. Jared will learn about these events and he will come looking for payment. If you are lucky, you’ll see me coming. If you are not lucky…you will not,” I said in warning. I knelt down and wiped the blood off the knife on the dead thug’s shirt before slipping it into a handy little pouch that carried another knife for emergencies or jobs. Slowly, I looked back to the boss who had turned rather pale looking.
            I grabbed up the envelope, tucked it away in my jacket and left. Truthfully, I hated this life. Hated simply existing like this. I knew that by Jared’s standards I had done the right thing. By his standards, I was on top of my game and he would be amused.
            Yet, as I made it outside the club into the cool night, I knew this was not to my standards. I did not want to kill anymore. It was never part of my life before him but now it was the way things were. Despite my qualms about murder, I knew too well the price of refusing to obey.  It was a time that I envied the humans. They were simply killed. Death is easy.
            I brushed aside those thoughts as I worked my way down the sidewalk. I still had a part to play and money to collect.
            A few hours later, I stepped out of the last club for the night. I had collected from ten different businesses tonight. Only that first one had given me any trouble. I had been looking forward to having tomorrow off. Now I knew that Jared would send me out to deal with the problem placed before him. The only thing left for me to know would be whether or not they would see me coming.

2

            I arrived back at the house a little after the agreed upon time. I knew Jared was impatiently waiting inside when I spotted a familiar figure standing on the stoop. It was Sarah. At least that was the first name I knew her by. Now, she went by the name Virginia Hudson. She had been with Jared the day he found me. It had taken a while before she saw the value in my presence.
            She was lucky enough to have retained her long hair. Her blond, curly locks were pulled up into a more professional bun. She was dressed as a young professional woman. Our home was made up to look like an office and Virginia worked at the front desk as a way to monitor the people who came in and out. Her typewriter she used to record the activities of those who came in down to the smallest detail. Since she had pale skin, her working in an office till all hours of the night made sense. She had been a very lovely woman in her human years since now she was utterly breathtaking. Yet another ruse to fool anyone who might come looking for trouble.
            Virginia looked over to me as I made my way up the steps.
            “You’re a little late…and you smell faintly of blood. What have you been up to?” Virginia asked out loud since the streets were practically empty.
            “Unfortunately…” I began as I produced the new knife. “One of the thugs tonight decided to try and avoid paying their dues.”
            Virginia looked to the knife and then smiled as she crossed her arms.
            “And?”
            I slid the knife with practiced ease back into the spot in my jacket as I spoke. “And I took care of the matter in the usual manner. Of course, I have to let Charles know what happened and go from there.” Charles was the current name for Jared.
            Virginia was still smiling.
            “Sometime, I would love to go and see this for myself. It intrigues me to hear about this.”
            I moved farther up the steps to look up at her. Although no matter if I stood on the same step, I would always look up at Sarah since she was much taller and older than I.
            “Ask Charles; see what he says about that.”
            Virginia chuckled before heading inside and I followed along behind her.
            I headed up the stairs to go locate “Charles”. Oddly enough, he was Charles in public, but in private he wanted us to call him Jared even though we were called by our changed names rather than our former names. I turned and started down the long hallway.
However, I did not have to go far.
            Jared’s room was the first one on the right. The door was cracked open.
            I knocked on the doorframe and waited for the reply. It was no long before the faint sound of a book closing sounded within the room.
            “Enter,” said the familiar voice.
            I slowly opened the door and stepped inside.
            The view inside was a familiar one. Jared was sitting in a chair in the corner of his room facing towards the door. He had one leg crossed over the other with a closed book on his lap. Jared was dressed as fashionable as a man could be in this era. His sacque suit was typical of the men in the era though it looked impeccable. The gray jacket of the suit set was open showing his putty colored button down shirt and a dark brown silk tie with diagonal stripes. The tie itself was secured with a tie pin. His shoes were the typical two typed variety of white and tan for his causal look. His bowler hat was hanging on a nearby hat rack that normally covered his auburn hair. That hairstyle had not changed one bit since I first saw him. Men were lucky in that regard.
            A slow but handsome smile crossed his perfect lips. That smile softened his square jaw making him look completely approachable.  His looks had completely disarmed me the moment we met despite the circumstances. He was an undoubtedly handsome man.
            “Ah, there you are. I was beginning to wonder about you. Come, get comfortable and have a seat,” Jared said as he motioned to the chair near him.
            I carefully removed my jacket that covered me up as I headed over to take the offered seat. Then, I draped the jacket over my legs so I could get to it easily when I reported about the evening.
            “Yes, I knew you would begin to wonder,” I replied.
            Jared looked me over with a smile that I knew too well. A suggestive smile.
            “It never fails to make one admire your beauty in a dress like that.”
            I softly smiled. “Thank you Jared.”
            “You have everything?”
            I looked down to my jacket and pulled out the ten envelopes with the money inside and placed them on the small table between us.
            “I counted as I went along. It is all there.”
            He leaned back into his chair and steepled his fingers.
            “I smell blood.”
            It was then that I produced the knife that he would know was not my own. I also placed that on the table next to the money as I sat back a bit.
            “Unfortunately, Mr. O’Connell tried to…dodge a payment. First, by using one of his thugs to appeal to me and secondly by a second thug who tried to stab that knife into my back when I moved over to pick up the money from his desk.”
            I watched him think that over for a moment. He seemed to be unaffected by this news but he was one that calculated. Those blood red eyes were looking off as he thought over this news. His mind working out the various angles.
            “Did you handle this act in the usual fashion?”
            I nodded. “Yes I did.  I gave them something to think about.”
            He chuckled under his breath.
            “Yes, I have seen your work in that area. I know you followed the protocol. Now, we have some follow through to handle.”
            I nodded again. “I thought as much.”
            Jared laughed as he looked over to me. “Ah, you are very smart my dear. You anticipated this move.”
            “I did.”
            He smiled to me. “My smart Pauline. Before I decide what the course of action is to be, I need to hear just what happened from the time you walked in.”
            I nodded to him and calmly explained everything to him. Of course, it was not just the actions I took that he was interested in. He knew I picked out those subtle details. The ability to catch the little things that most people did not pick up on. It was something that had become prominent in me when I became a vampire. It was nearly a form of mind reading save for the fact I could not hear the thoughts in their head. I would pick up on their body language, facial expressions, the way they moved, the move of a hand, the tone of a voice and all of this I could even do to people who were behind me. It was as if my senses were much higher than that of other vampires. It made me valuable to Jared.
            Once I was done filling him in on what had happened, I sat back and waited silently as he went deep into thought about what I had told him.
            “Well, it seems some retribution has all ready been made. However, if they thought of this once, they will certainly think of it again.” Jared looked over to me now. “Tomorrow night, you will go back to them and tell them that I would like to meet with Mr. O’Connell and his crew at our usual place. Pauline, during this meeting will be when you are to act. When I say the words, you are to pick one at random and do what you do best. Do not pick anyone that he would need to keep his operation running. Just someone that will help us get the point across.”
            I nodded to him. “Understood,” I said as I rose from the chair.
            Jared smiled up to me. “You have done well. Make sure you treat yourself tonight before turning to your hobbies.”
            A faint smile appeared on my lips. Jared was rather pleased with me if he spoke in such a manner to me. Normally, he would insist on going with me but he said no such thing.
            “Thank you very much Jared. I appreciate it.”
            Jared picked his book back up and looked back to it. “Of course you are,” he said as he opened his book back up.
            I turned and walked out of the room closing the door back the way he preferred it before moving to change into some more comfortable clothes. It was always harder when I had to worry about my clothing when I hunted for my next meal. Tonight, however, I would get to do the one thing that Jared usually did not allow. I would not have to pick some person with a home or family that would miss them. For once, I could pick someone that did not have those luxuries. It made it easier on my mind to not think that the person whose life I was taking had something that they lived for.
            However, it never made it easy to deal with the taking of a life…even to sustain my own.
           
3

          A few hours later we had all gathered in the usual warehouse where we discussed business. A broad dark wood table had been brought in. Five chairs were placed on both sides. However, Jared and the rest of us always took the side facing the entrance to the warehouse. Tonight however, while Jared, Sarah, Christopher and Richard sat in their usually seats with Jared in the middle, I was standing off in the shadows where they would not see me when I came up form behind.
            I all ready knew what target I was going to pick for this show of force. Mr. O’Connell was not going to bring along his young son, Samuel, for this meeting. However, his younger brother, Marcus O’Connell, was working his way up through the organization. Currently, he was his brother’s enforcer. Marcus was being groomed to take over in the event of his brother’s death. Tonight, that dream was going to be taken away.
            The sound of voices outside drew my gaze over to the doorway. The door swung open and in walked Nicolas O’Connell. The leader of this group. He was followed by his two lieutenants, his personal record keeper and finally his brother Marcus who closed the door behind him.
            Jared looked over to the group as they entered and headed towards the table. “Welcome. Glad you could make it to this little meeting to discuss a problem we seem to be having.”
            O’Connell’s group took their seats all except for his brother that stood behind his chair like I knew he would.
            “Yes, seems we do have something to discuss,” Mr. O’Connell said.
            Jared smirked as he wove his fingers together. “I see nothing to discuss. Merely that you sought to end our agreement by simply disposing of the person who came to collect the usual payment.”
            Mr. O’Connell looked nervous at that. “Yes, well. Well would she be now?”
            “She is taking care of some other business and will join us shortly. However, you have not answered my question. Maybe though, that is because it is what happened. You know the arrangement Mr. O’Connell. You wanted protection and you wanted to run your own business. My price is fair compared to most and I left you alone. Now, you are gaining more revenue and wanted to keep the profits for yourself. You should count yourself lucky that I did not send my collector back for a larger sum.”
            “Mr. Finnegan, I…I did not…”
            Jared waved his hand to silence Mr. O’Connell. “Mr. O’Connell, I want no excuses or lies from you. Payment will be taken from you to remind you just who you are dealing with.”
            As Jared placed his hand on the table, I moved quickly. I appeared behind Marcus wearing the clothing of a typical young lady of the 20s. However, I carried the glint of silver in my hand. A dagger. In a quick motion, I reached up and sliced across the front of Marcus’ neck despite his height. His crimson blood spraying out over his brother and the others. There was a collective gasp of shock from his group as they rose from their chairs. They were sputtering in shock which died quickly the moment Marcus’ lifeless body fell to the floor and their eyes settled on me.
            I looked back to them with a straight face. “Mr. O’Connell, the price has been paid for now. However, this will be the only warning. If I am forced to defend myself again from one of yours or anyone who you have hired to remove me from my position then I have been given full rights to end your life on the spot in the manner of my choosing.”
            Jared’s voice sounded from the other side of the now blood spattered men. “And I would not test her sir. She has done many of this sort of collecting for me and has become very good at it. Not a soul will know we are behind it and it could be made to look as though your own group has done you in. Think well on this before you decide to try and remove yourself from our arrangement again.”
            Mr. O’Connell looked at me shocked. His body language telling me he wanted to turn and look to Jared but he was afraid.
            “I believe Mr. O’Connell wants to know if he may leave now,” I stated to Jared.
            Jared chuckled softly. “Of course. You may leave now Mr. O’Connell however, you must leave the body of your brother behind.”
            Mr. O’Connell flinched as if he was about to object. However, he made the wise decision to give me a wide berth as he and his remaining crew quickly hurried out of the warehouse.
            My eyes found Jared across the table and they were dancing with mirth.
            “Very well done Pauline. You have done well tonight. For tonight you have earned a bit of pleasure. You may have an extra hour to do with what you will outside of our home tonight. Make sure you arrive back on time however.”
            I softly smiled hiding my joy at the situation. “Thank you so very much Jared. I appreciate it very much.”
            “Of course you do. We will deal with the body,” Jared said dismissively as he rose from his chair.
            With that, I turned and worked to walk slowly out of the warehouse. Once I was outside, I could barely contain my excitement. This was my first chance in weeks to see a man that I had been aching to see. Rutger Haywood was a young man I had met some months ago when I was doing my job for Jared. At the time I was in a very public place when some other men began to accost me because of my appearance at the time. Rutger was the man that came to my aid.
            From that day, we met together at every available opportunity. He learned my schedule for pick ups and the clubs I visited. Whenever I had an available opportunity, I would rush over to his place to meet him. We only ever had the chance to spend bare minutes together and yet I had fallen in love with the man and him with me. He had mentioned his desire a few times to marry me. It was only by distraction that I was able to not answer his questions and turn him onto another subject. He was the only man I had ever felt such a strong desire for in my life that I was nearly willing to try and bring him into my world. Yet, I feared for that day as I was bound in what seemed like a painful eternity to Jared.
            I hurried across town and found a quick meal in an alleyway before making my way to his home. After feeding, I cleaned off the knife and hid it inside my jacket before getting rid of the body.  Then, I headed off down the street. Simply knowing I was near his home made me giddy. Soon I stopped and turned to look up at the townhouse I stood in front of. A smile crossed my face as I headed up onto the stoop. I quickly adjusted my clothing before knocking on Rutger’s door.
            Inside, I heard movement. The rustling of the newspaper as it was being folded up and placed down. A faint creak of the floor echoed as he rose up from his chair. The thump of his feet sounded across the floor as he came towards the door. Then, that voice, that soothing and familiar voice came through the door.
            “Who is it?” Rutger asked.
            I softly smiled as I spoke up. “Someone you know.”
            Silence. Then, the sound of the door being unlocked and the door finally opened.
            Rutger looked just as I always remembered him. His soft brown eyes now wide with shock and surprise but also happiness. His black hair was carefully groomed for the typical businessman in this era. He wore his usual brown suit that he wore to work. His tan vest peeked out from behind the lapels of his jacket. Behind that was his tan and white striped tie that was tied over his white collared shirt.
            Eventually, his shock faded into the happy smile I had grown to love.
            “Pauline, I am so happy to see you. This is such a surprise. Please, come on in,” Rutger said as he stepped aside.
            I stepped up quickly into his house as he shut the door. Then, I turned to face him smiling.
            “I know this is sudden. However, I have a little of free time and I thought of you,” I said.
            He grinned. “I’m so glad to see you.” Rutger came over and gave me a hug.
            I hugged him back resting my head against his chest. For the first time in weeks, I felt calm and at peace with the world. Despite the monsters I dealt with, I felt safe.
            Rutger slowly pulled back from me so I could see his smile again. “I have missed you.”
            “I missed you too.”
            Rutger smiled as he leaned in towards me. His lips pressed gently against mine. As we kissed, I wrapped my arms around his neck as his arms encircled my waist. He never minded the chill of my lips as we kissed. It simply was too brief for my tastes.
            As Rutger pulled away, I softly smiled to him. “That seemed rather short for me being gone so long.”
            He smirked. “Normally, you like me holding back.”
            “I have missed you more than usual lately.”
            Rutger smiled as he pulled me back in towards him. He was pressing my body gently up against his.
            “Really?”
            I nodded. “Really.”
            He smiled and kissed me again. This time I could he was not pulling back any time soon. I wanted that.
            Slowly, I closed my eyes and kissed him back. I enjoyed the feeling of his soft and warm lips against me. It was the only time I ever got to feel this feeling and not be in the process of ending a human’s life. Now, I was sharing in one. The warm breath against my cold lips almost made them feel warm again.
            I wound my arms around Rutger more as I lost myself to the moment in a way I usually never allowed myself. My small hands slid through his short locks as I indulged myself in this kiss. However, I was still oh so careful as I felt our tongues sliding wetly over and around each other first in his mouth and then in mine.
            His hands roamed from their place at my lower back to various places up and down my back. Those hands gently caressed over my back and my sides. Then, I felt his hands moving to gently unbutton my jacket.
            I moved back to tell him not to when I heard a noise. I jerked back from him.
            “Wait, I heard something,” I said as I looked around.
            Rutger looked around. “So did I.” He looked down to me. “Wait here.”
            I watched as he slowly drew away from me and headed down the hallway towards his room. My nerves began to get the better of me as I headed over to the window to look outside. As I looked around, I saw nothing out of place. The last of the people were slowly heading home or off to the seedy places for the night.
            Then, I heard soft footsteps behind me. They did not sound like Rutger. Slowly, I turned around and gasped in shock. There before me stood Jared. He looked enraged as he looked down at me.
            “After all I’ve done for you…this is how you spend your time away from me.” Jared said practically growling in his rage.
            “J-jared…” I replied in fear.
            “No words from you! I will show you where you place really lies.”
            I flinched back against the wall as Jared ran at me. My wide eyes locked on his rage filled ones. With a whimper I closed my eyes and wondered if I was able to feel what it was like to die.

4

            Well, I did not die from Jared’s rush towards me. However, I did find out that a vampire can not be knocked unconscious. Jared was brutal for what seemed like a couple of hours when only seconds had passed. I had been so concerned about the blows he was landing upon me that I never took notice of the fact I was being taken and where I was being taken to.
            It was only when I had a chance to realize that the sounds around me had changed that I knew we were somewhere else. Jared knew all the back roads to various locations. I knew not one person had seen us pass by unless they had been looking.
            I tried to figure out where we were but Jared’s hand roughly jerked my head by my hair making me cry out. However, with his constant shoving I lost my footing. This only served to make the pressure from his hand rise along with the pain.
            Suddenly, he stopped me. His hand in my hair made me bend back against him.
            “So, you thought you’d have a little secret from me on the side. When are you going to get it? You are mine and if you will not offer yourself to me then you will offer yourself to no one but those that come to the club looking for it,” Jared said with fury in his voice that echoed off the walls.
            Then it hit me, I knew exactly where we were. Jared had created a system of underground chambers. A few areas had been made for escapes in the event that someone discovered us however others were meant for the newborns and punishment.
            “Jared…please…not this. Please.” I begged as I finally looked up into his crimson eyes.
            “No, you don’t tell me what to do. I made you and I will give you up but I will show you your place,” Jared said as he looked to the others. “Open the door.”

            As I listened to the sound of the heavy, solid and thick iron door opening Jared ripped the clothing off of my body. Every shred of fabric that had one covered my body now littered the floor leaving me standing naked.
I knew this room as I had been placed in one before. The only light was coming from this long hallway we now stood in. The room itself was tiny only room enough for one person. Against the wall that was revealed were a series of chains and cuffs that had been made especially to hold against a vampire’s strength.
            Jared shoved me roughly forward only for me to be grabbed roughly by other sets of hands.
            I fought against them with all my might. “No! Please! Not this again!”
            My voice fell on deaf ears as they shoved me back into the room and worked the shackles into their places. Everything had been positioned in the proper location to keep the vampire’s arms and legs spread just wide enough that they could not use their full strength on any part of them to break free. This fact settled in quickly and heavily upon me as I felt myself being fitted into the restraints. My body becoming rigid as it was fixed into place against the wall. Yet, I still fought knowing I could very well be down here for a long time.
            The hands had nearly stopped their work when Jared spoke again.
            “No, I want the whole thing on.”
            I whimpered as I pulled against the restraints as they locked the additional ones on my upper arms, thighs, waist and around my neck.
            Finally, they stopped and stepped back. I looked over to Jared still pleading under my breath to let me go.
            Jared walked up to me calmly. “You are mine and I will never let you go.” He forced my mouth open and shoved a thick cloth inside before tying the leather strap over my mouth to silence my screams.
            My screams and pleading were muffled by the gag as I looked to Jared in fear. Then, my panic settled in as Jared gave the nod and the door with no window was slowly closed sending me into darkness. I could not hear any sounds save for my panicked whimpering but I knew they were locking the door securely and leaving me here. Panic raged through my mind. Years of such a punishment had made me fearful of places like these.
            That panic was my only companion for some time. I was not sure how long. However, that panic was eventually joined by another…hunger. It was then I was aware that I had been trapped here for at least a week as I could go that long before feeling the need to feed again. The panic increased as my hunger rose. I knew I could be here for a long time. I knew what I would become if I remained here too long. I had seen the results of one such punishment.
            More days passed and soon the panic was overshadowed by my hunger. I was beginning to feel frantic for even a single drop of blood. Every fiber of my being began to cry out for that hot rush of crimson down my throat. My mind no longer had rational thought as to where it might come from only that it wanted it now.
            When this very thought became nearly unbearable, sound came back to me. Blinding light as the door was finally opened despite the dimness of the lights in the corridor.
            “He said to remove the restraints and then open the opposite door. Don’t want to ruin the setup,” said a familiar female voice.
            “Yeah, yeah, I know,” replied a familiar male voice.
            I slowly felt movement being allowed back into my body. It felt so foreign to be able to move again. My head did not even feel like it was part of my body. It was as if it was feeling this happening to someone else. When the last of the straps was undone, I stumbled nearly falling down to the ground. The lack of blood had weakened my body despite the fact it yearned for it.
            The pair had to catch me and help me up right.
            “Woah, steady there now. We’ll fix you right up,” the woman said.
            The man took off the gag and removed the cloth from inside my mouth.
            “I…I need…” I began to say but I could not finish my words.
            “You need blood. We know, we have some for you,” the man said.
            “P-please…” I begged.
            I heard one of them unlocking the door in front of me that opened up into a bigger room.
            As soon as the door opened my body stiffened in reaction. My senses honed in on the metallic scent of freshly spilt blood so very close by. Slowly, I began to move forward to get closer to it. The scent was intoxicating. I was going to take it for myself. No one else would be allowed to have it.
            The blood puddle in various places on the floor but it was like a trail leading me to my goal. My mind barely registered the man huddled up in the corner. It only registered that he was bleeding. He had what I wanted... No, what I needed. My lips curled back as I moved towards him with the look of a predator.
            He was speaking to me but his words meant nothing to me. The only thing that mattered was the sounding of the thick thump of his heart in his chest. The intoxicating scent of fear and blood was move than I could stand.
            I did not waste another moment as I rushed at the man who feebly fought against me. It took me no time at all to pin his weak body to the ground and sink my teeth into his neck. And oh, the sweetness of it all. The hot liquid rush of blood flooding into my mouth and down my throat. I would drink it all down. I ignored his feeble attempts to push me away as I fed greedily at his throat. Each gulp filling me up and sating the lust. Eventually, his body slowly stopped moving as I drained his life away.
I sucked down the last drops I could manage and sat back feeling the rush of strength flooding back into my body. Slowly, I licked the blood off my lips as if I were a cat who was savoring the last of the cream. My senses came alive. My naked body felt the chill of the underground, the sound of water faintly dripping somewhere and the feeling of two others that were watching.
Slowly, I looked back over to them. The woman was simply standing in the doorway but the other man was leaning against the wall inside the room with his arms crossed. It was Sarah and Christopher.
Christopher was smirking. “Seems like you enjoyed that.”
I slowly rose feeling oddly naked despite the fact they had seen me unclothed this whole time.
He smirked at me as if he knew something I did not.
“Maybe you want to take a look at the source,” he said.
Those words carried an ominous feeling to them. It had never occurred to me to look down at the body of the man I had just fed on. Slowly, I stepped away from the body before slowly looking down. My eyes went wide as I gasped and backed up against the wall.
The man’s body that now lay limply on the ground was Rutger. I had just killed the man I had loved. I placed a hand over my mouth to stop myself from screaming.
“You need to learn your place in this world it this’ll keep happening,” Christopher admonished as he walked out of the room.
I could not do anything but stare down at his corpse and feel regret like a flavor on my tongue.
Sarah slowly walked towards me looking sorry for me.
“Hey, it’ll be okay. You just need to stop doing things like this. Jared is a very kind man as long as you just follow the rules. I’d give anything to have him look at me the way he looks at you, ya know,” Sarah said.
I slowly managed to contain my horror enough to lower my hand from my mouth. It took me a bit longer to contain myself so I would not collapse or simply start screaming. Eventually, I thought I might be able to talk without that happening.
“I…I would rather he gave those looks to you…than to me. If I could make that happen…without things like this…then I would…” I replied.
Sarah sighed. “You know Jared. What he wants he get or he takes. That’s the only way about it.” She looked me over a moment. “Come on let’s get you cleaned up. He wants you working in the club for a while until he can trust you again.”
I shuddered at the thought. “He will not…I know it…”
“That’s up to him. Come on.” Sarah gently took my arm and led me over to the doorway. A thin robe hung there that she wrapped around me before leading me back down the hallway.
The club. It was the one place I never wanted to work. I had worked in similar ones in the early days. It was a rough place and Jared did not place any rules on the men. The girls only had one rule. The men got what they wanted but if the man was a human, then after he got what he wanted he was our dinner or he was to be taken. Later, he would be dinner for someone else. However, if you were unlucky enough for it to be a vampire, you did not have a right. He got what he wanted and you had to go right back to work and possibly into the arms of another man or vampire.
My only hope was that I would please Jared quickly enough that I would not be doing it for long.


5

A few months later, I was walking along through the nearly empty streets. It was late, nearly morning. I had only been allowed out to feed and I had not done it yet.
However, the tension was reaching an all time high. Jared was watching everything going on very carefully. There were even days I caught him following me through the streets on my errands both during the day and the night. All of this because of my love for a human. My punishment for that had only ended a couple of weeks ago. I was doing my very best to hold myself together but it felt like a losing battle. My psyche was falling apart and I had to hide it from Jared. I also had to get back on his good side and soon. I was no longer a plaything at the club but I was on a short leash as a collector.
            I was making sure that if I had a time to be back that I was going to be on time or early to keep Jared in a good mood. Usually, when he was in a bad mood, it was something that I had done. It was rarely the fault of the others. The fault was usually mine because I had qualms still about the things we were doing. I would hesitate sometimes when it came to killing people. Hesitating at all when Jared gave an order to do something was simply not allowed. He had severe punishments for a simple hesitation without a single word being said.
            My body shuddered as I thought about the time I had voiced my thoughts on the way things were going and how I was not so sure it was the right way. I did not want to think about those things and it was that fear that kept me here with Jared. True, there were other things. The fear of the loneliness that would hit the moment I had to wander forever a lone. I never dared to leave Jared. He would hunt me down to the ends of the Earth to keep me by his side. I was not strong enough to fight Jared’s will.
            My head was reeling in thought trying to figure out some way to make Jared happy again. I was not expecting to run across anyone.  It was then that I heard a voice speaking softly to me.
            “Are you all right ma’am?”
            I flinched at the sound since I did not recognize the voice. My dark red eyes looked over and spotted the figure of a man leaning against a nearby brick wall. The Southern drawl was something I had not heard in ages. Then, it occurred to me that I needed to respond.
            “Excuse me?” I asked.
            The man looked up towards me. His dirty blond hair was more curly and long than any current hair fashion though he had slicked it back. The paleness of his skin gave him away as one of my kind just as much as his crimson eyes. His clothes were very typical of the era though a very causal version compared to Jared.
            Yet, it was the look on his face that caught my eye the most. His crimson gaze took in my appearance. Though, I was not in the flapper dress anymore I still looked as though I belonged more in a cabaret than at home tending to children. It was because of my appearance that I expected lust or even disgust. However, he looked concerned.
            He pushed away from the wall and walked towards me in that typical graceful style that our kind possessed. His hands were down at his sides.
            “I sensed that you were troubled. Although, the way you were carrying yourself spoke of the same feelings,” he replied.
            This statement unnerved me. It was true that some of us possessed powers based on our strengths as a human. However, I had not yet met one that could sense emotions.
            “You can sense emotions…?” I asked as a way to avoid answering his question.
            “Yes I can. I can also manipulate emotions.” He looked at me right in the eyes despite our height difference.
At that moment, I knew he was not looking down at me in the sense that I was something unimportant. He held great care in those eyes.
The man slowly held his hand out to me. “Pardon me, ma’am. Maybe it would be best for me to introduce myself. My name is Jasper Whitlock.”
My earlier breeding as a Southern woman held over Jared’s demand that I talk only to clients as I found myself placing my small hand into his.
“My name is Pauline Rutherford,” I replied meekly.
Jasper surprised me as he gently kissed the back of my hand. “A pleasure Miss Rutherford. May I ask if that is your birth name?”
I paused for a moment as I looked up to him. My defenses came up. “I could ask the same of you.”
Jasper simply smiled to me. “Of course. Jasper is my birth name.”
I kept my guard up. “How do I know you speak the truth?”
He grew a bit serious. “I suppose you would have to trust me.”
I looked at him hard. It was one of my strengths for strategy and picking out the lies. I had never met this man before in all my years yet something made me want to trust him.
“All right. Pauline…is not my birth name.”
“Ah, I see. May I ask what is then?”
I took a slow and very unnecessary breath. “Nicole…Nicole Fisher.”
Jasper smiled softly to me. “A pleasure Miss.”
I slowly took my hand out of his and our hands dropped away to our respective sides. Finally, I made a bold move.
“You were born in the South.” I stated.
“Yes ma’am. I was, in Texas actually. The accent does give me away.”
I nodded but was stunned by the revelation. “May I ask the year?”
Jasper seemed to grow wary now however he did not back away. “I was born in 1844. Now, may I ask why you wish to know? What was it that surprised you?”
“I…I was born in Texas as well…though some years later.”
Jasper became genuinely curious. “How many years later ma’am?”
“I was born in 1878.”
“Thirty-four years apart then. It is not likely that we would have met.”
“I doubt that highly even if we had been born in the same year.”
“Why do you doubt that so highly?” Jasper asked looking as if I had said something proven untrue all ready.
“Well, by the way that you stand, I can tell you were in the army at some point. I know my history from my father and it must have been the Civil War. You were a soldier and though my father was one as well I was rarely accepted at social gatherings of any sort unless I was at my father’s side for the evening.”
Jasper grew rather concerned. “That seems rather harsh if I may say so.”
“Mr. Whitlock…” I started.
“Jasper, if you please,” he said.
“Jasper…you were a soldier. You do remember what things were like for the Indians living on the continent do you not?”
This question made him look at me more closely. “You had some connection to those Indians that would keep you apart from those events?”
I nodded. “Yes, I do. Becoming a vampire does not change your nationality. My father might have been the epitome of a typical Southern gentleman. Yet, my mother was pure daughter of a Cherokee tribe that had been moved to a reservation in what was one Texas. The reservation where I spent my early years till it was easier for others to accept. You know as well as I do that being from Africa during those times was not the best to be but they gained freedom all though slowly. The very same went for the Indian tribes that were still left.”
Jasper actually looked sorry for the anger and sadness that had been brought out of me. I knew he could feel it all.
However, he did not have the chance to respond to my angry words as a familiar but frightening voice broke into the silence between us.
“Pauline!” said Jared with a harsh snap of his voice that felt like the cracking of a whip.
I whirled around trying to hide that fear. “Charles… I am sorry. I forgot the time…”
However, Jared would not be appeased as he grabbed my left arm ignoring the presence of Jasper. He jerked me roughly towards him.
“I sent you out to feed and instead you are here wasting time. Apparently, you aren’t as hungry as you said. Maybe you can go a while longer.”
“Charles please…I did not mean…”
Jasper’s voice cut into the conversation as he came over. “Sir, I will have to insist that you let her go.”
Jared whipped his angry gaze over to Jasper. “This is none of your business so I suggest you leave.”
Then, I look appeared on Jasper’s face that would have made me flinch if it had been targeted at me. The look was one of superiority. One that demanded attention and obedience. The look of a superior officer.
“It is my business if a lady is being harmed in my presence. Such actions are no act of a gentleman.”
“Please Jasper do not…” I started to say before Jared gripped my arm tighter and pulled me up to his side to shut me up. Jared’s grip would have bruised if I had been human…or rather it would have broken my arm.
“Then, I will take her out of your presence. I created her and she works for me. She will do so till I have no need for her,” Jared replied having none of Jasper’s chivalry.
With Jared’s final words on the matter, he turned around jerking me along for the ride. All I could do was follow; I did not have a choice. I could not hide my fear any longer as Jared roughly took me back towards the house we resided in. My fear led me to believe that I might not have another day with the current state of things. So, I looked back one last time to Jasper’s form standing in the middle of the sidewalk.
The look of his face was one that shocked me the most. There were the ones I expected: anger, confusion, sadness and a careful restraint. Yet, the look that was most prevalent on his face was that of a sad understanding. I willed myself to figure out how he could know anything about this but before any thought about it would come to me we turned a corner and Jasper’s lone figure disappeared from my sight.


6

I spent another agonizing month under Jared’s version of punishment before he let me out again. However, he was not done with me yet. Instead of letting me back on my regular assignments he sent me to work back in the speak easy again.
It was the one place I loathed above all else. I would try so hard not to return to this place and then something would happen. It would be the smallest of slip ups on my part and he would place me back here again. If I was lucky, I would be working on the human side of the speak easy. However, if I was unlucky I would end up on the vampire side of things.
            What is the difference? On the human side of this, the men could do as they wished with the women. However, if that male wanted intercourse he would be taken into the back and would instead end up as dinner for the vampires.  On the vampire side of things, the vampire males could also have whatever they wanted. Yet, the difference came if those men wanted intercourse with the women there. Be it human or vampire, the lady does not have a choice. She must do as he asks for as long as he asks and pays for it. However, it was often typical for the men to not honor the agreement and take more than their share and nothing would be done about it.
            That atmosphere would be the one I ended up in this night. I would not be performing like some other vampire ladies. However, I would be a server of drinks and the like. However, I would stop my duties if I was asked for.
            This is why I stood in the alleyway behind the vampire portion of the speak easy. The night was thick and dark and only a single light bulb flicked over our heads. Every so often it would send the alleyway into total darkness before giving us light again.
I was dressed the part of the flirty flapper. Much more skin was showing than was comfortable to me. It was so tight to my body that it was nearly a second skin and it pushed in all the right places to mound my breasts up as if they might burst from the dress at any moment. I might have even thought I looked nice this way if I had did not have to go through such vulgar actions when I was dressed up in this manner.
            Unfortunately, I was not out here alone. Jared did not trust me on my own still and that meant I had to have someone with me at all times. At the moment it was Virginia that was making sure I did not try and make a run for it.
            I huddled against a wall as I waited till I had to go inside. Virginia was simply watching me. I could feel her eyes on me like a hawk.
            “You really need to work things out if you don’t want to do these types of things,” Virginia admonished.
            I sighed and looked over to her. “You do not get it. How many other vampires do you get to converse with? How many others does he let you see and do things with?”
            She thought for a moment and shrugged. “A few I suppose. What does that have to do with anything?”
            “How many others have you seen me going around with?”
            Virginia really looked at me then as she thought about it. “None.”
            “Exactly. I never get to see or talk to anyone else save for those that live with him at the house or those I have to do business with. I am not allowed to talk to any one else. If I even try it I end up back here or in those underground rooms. By the time I am allowed out of there, I am nearly desperate to talk to someone, anyone else that will not berate me for the things I have done but listen to me. Really listen and be my friend. Yet, I am not even allowed a true friend.”
            Virginia uncrossed her arms as she looked at me. Her eyes took me in from head to toe.
            “I never knew that,” she replied.
            I sighed as I looked back to the ground. “Now you do. Now you can not wonder why I keep things to myself. Everyone around me…all ready knows everything. Nothing I have is private…is only mine…”
            Virginia went silent at that. If I did not have my better than average senses, I would have to look and see if she was still there. However, I felt her there. Her presence was something I could feel like the presence of those walking by the end of the alleyway that we stood within.
            Then, something changed. It was another presence. Someone watching us that was close by and it was not someone I knew well. Although, I had the distinct feeling that I had felt this presence before.
            Slowly, I looked up and over to see who it was that was watching us. I stiffened in shock as I spotted the vampire I had met a month ago. The one who said his named was Jasper.
            Finally, Virginia spotted him too because she called out to him.
            “This is a restricted area. You need to move along sir,” Virginia spoke to him. “If you want to go into the club then you need to go around to the other door.”
            Jasper still walked down the alleyway towards her. His eyes looked to me for a moment but then they locked on Virginia without emotion.
            “I have private business to settle with this woman here. It needs to be finished soon,” Jasper spoke confidently.
            I looked over to Virginia and she looked to me. We stared at each other for what seemed like the longest time. Then, something seemed to be settled for her because she looked back to Jasper.
            “All right, fine. You have ten minutes. I will be back by then. If it takes longer than that you need to work it out either in the club or our office,” she replied.
            Then, with a swift motion, she bounded high into the air to land on the roof over our heads.
            Slowly, I looked back to Jasper and I softly spoke.
            “She is out of hearing range now…” I said softly but that was not what I really wanted to say. I was nervous and scared.
            “Do not be afraid Nicole. I came here to see if you are all right,” Jasper said kindly as he kept his place just across the alley from me.
            I tried to avoid wrapping my arms around myself. It seemed odd that he was asking me how I felt when he knew how I felt.
            “Why are you asking…when you all ready know?” I asked warily.
            “Nicole, I know the type of situation you are in. I know what it feels like to have nothing scared and private. I do know how you feel but I wanted to give you the chance to at least feel as if something was private.”
            “H-how do you know?”
            Jasper looked at me gently. “I escaped a similar situation. A place were I was merely a tool to be used for a purpose I did not choose for myself. However, I had others with me that showed me that I did not have to stay. They made it possible for me to leave and find my own life. I have not found it yet but I have the chance now. I believe you are one who deserves the same chance that I gained.”
            I sighed and looked down to the ground. “I can not wish or even hope for things such as that. He will never let me be. He would track me down to the ends of the earth.”
            Jasper, apparently, was not going to let that be the end of it. I felt him drawing closer to me. As he grew closer my fear increased not knowing what he was doing. He must have picked up on that because he stopped a couple of steps away from me.
            Slowly, I looked up to me. I knew I was scared and upset. I wanted so badly what Jasper was talking about but I knew it was useless to think that I would ever have that.
            The gentle look in Jasper’s eyes helped me relax more than anything. He did not want to hurt me.
            “May I?” he asked as he held out his left hand.
            “May you what…?” I asked.
            “Touch you.”
            I looked up into his crimson eyes for a moment as I considered his offer. It was very tempting. I wanted it more than anything. To be touched and held so gently as if I might break from any rougher touch. Nervously, I ran my teeth over my lower lip and slowly nodded.
            Jasper moved closer slowly and gently brushed his fingers tips over my right cheek till his hand lightly cupped the side of my face.
            The touch was so light and gentle and so pleasing that I stopped breathing and moving all together just to make this one last as long as it could.
            “You deserve so much more than this. You should not have to be afraid of all the time. Afraid of a simple touch from a compassionate place and so cautious of every move you make,” he said as he stepped up closer to me.
            Slowly, I took a silent breath that seemed so loud now. “I…I have to be.”
            “Why? Why take it at all?”
            I felt my lower lip trembling and I could not make it stop.
            “The last time…I tried to love someone Jared found out. The man was human but I loved him because he made me feel like more than just property. However, when Jared found out…” I had to stop for a moment to keep myself together. My wall was cracking ever so slightly. I pulled myself together enough to continue. “Jared kept me from feeding. Locked me away for months. When I was released…I was so starved. I was not myself. At the first scent of blood, I went for it without a thought. When…I was able to stop and think…I looked down to the body. Jared had taken the man I loved and left him down there…and I had killed him.”
            The emotions rolled inside of me rolled in like a tidal wave. A vampire could not cry but we could make those very sounds. I could not stop myself as I started to tremble with the despair that finally washed over me. The despair I had been keeping locked up all this time.
            Jasper’s face fell into one of sorrow as he looked down at me. This time, he did not ask as he drew me towards him and gently wrapped his arms around me.
            My arms moved on their own as if someone else owned them. They encircled his waist as I buried my face into his chest. I felt his hand gently stroking my hair. His presence was so soothing.
            “I am so sorry Nicole. You should not have been made to do that. Everyone has the right to be in love. Please, trust me. I know I way that you can leave. You can me far away before anyone knows of it.”
            “How…?” I heard myself asking without any thought whatsoever.
            “I would take care of everything. We would only have to meet somewhere and I could help you.”
            “I do not know if I can do this…”
            “You will not be alone. I will be there.”
            I was trying to think of some kind of response when I sensed Virginia was coming. Quickly, I moved away from Jasper.
            “She is coming. You should leave before…he punishes me again…”
            Jasper looked to me gently. He slowly nodded once. “You have time to think. I will keep everything arranged. If you remember where we first met, I stay around that area. Come there if you have questions or will take me up on my offer.”
            I nodded quickly. “She is nearly here. Hurry…please…”
            “Remember, you are worth more than this,” he said before seemingly disappearing from the alleyway in his burst of speed.
            Moments later, Virginia dropped back down into the alleyway nearby and looked to me.
            “So, what did he want?” she asked.
            “He wanted to make a deal with me. Wanted to set up some private time like some of the others in the club,” I quickly said before second guessing my lie.
            Virginia nodded. “Ah, I see. Guess you are popular with this crowd.” She glanced to the door as we heard the faint knock that sounded on it. Then, she looked back to me.
“Well, pull yourself together. Time to work.”
            I slowly headed over to the door as she opened for me. I headed into the dim club slowly pulling my wits back together. In the back of my mind, I could not help thinking back on what Jasper had said and offered to me. A way out. Something I had longed for since the beginning. The question now was, would I have the strength to accept and would I be able to get away with it?

7

            A month or so had passed and I had not been left alone even for the smallest moment. They were there at all times even when I went to feed. I could not even deviate from the area unless they said so.
            Everyday that passed of working in the club wore me down slowly. I could feel it happening. I knew if I did not escape soon from this pattern that they would finally break me. If that happened, then I would never leave.
            The very first day that they allowed me to walk out on my own without a shadow right behind me, it was simply to feed. However, I found myself wandering. My mind barely working save for the thoughts they were putting into my head. It never occurred to me to stop thinking them. At least, not in the front of my brain. In the back of my mind, the words Jasper said to me where still being whispered. It was even in his Southern voice. They were so hard to hear over the other thoughts in my head.
            The need to feed was keeping me from being able to think straight. The sounds of people talking on the sidewalks was louder than it should have been.
            Quickly, I ducked into an alley and ran. My senses told me everything I needed to know so that I never even had to pause and think. A left turn, right turn, straight ahead. My feet simply carried me as I ran through the alleyways. I suppose if I never ran into another human being I might not have stopped.
            However, the sound of a cough and the shuffling of feet on a garbage laden ground stopped me. Slowly, I turned my head to look down the alleyway. A solitary figure was shuffling down the alleyway keeping away from the opening that led out to the proper people walking along the sidewalk.
            The smell was something I had come to associate with vagrants. Those men I chose to feed off of instead of someone that might be missed. I never wanted to take the life but there was no other way once I started.
            I watched the man for a moment longer. He never looked in my direction. He never knew I was even here. I breathed in his scent despite the foulness of it all mingling with the garbage in the alley. If I was going to take his life, then I dealt with everything about them. It needed to be important. I needed to make them important to someone before they died.
            Then, I forced myself to stop thinking about it. I closed my eyes and took one last slow breath. My eyes flashed open and before the man knew what was going on he was on the ground. A second later he was dead. Only then did I actually feed on him. I never could make myself feed when they were struggling and fighting to live.
            Slowly, I drank my fill trying to keep myself from thinking about how I had just killed someone else. Someone who deserved to live and make something of their life.
            I rose up and looked down at his lifeless body laying there in the garbage. With a sigh, I moved to move the man’s body and hide it so no one would find him. Then, I stopped. A familiar presence was coming. Slowly, I looked up to the end of the alleyway and a figure appeared at the other end. The figure of Jasper. It finally occurred to me of where I was. My feet had carried me to the very area that we had first met and he had found me. Yet, here I was standing over a dead body. I did not want to be seen like this.
            “Please, do not go,” Jasper said as he slowly walked towards me.
            “I…I do not just want to stand here…and talk. I can not,” I replied with a slightly shaky voice.
            “Then, let us talk somewhere else.”
            I watched him as he drew nearer. With a nod, I turned and moved down the end of the alleyway. I moved around the corner and put some distance between myself and the dead body.
            Eventually, I stopped and backed up against the wall not caring if it was dirty or not because I felt dirty anyway. My eyes were focused on the ground but I could feel Jasper standing across from me and looking at me. He never said a word. He knew what I was feeling. If he had asked how I was, I would have simply walked away.
            “I am sorry,” Jasper finally said.
            I looked up to Jasper and saw that same gentle look on his face. A look that was completely disarming. He was unlike Jared in ever possible manner. Jasper was kind, compassionate, giving, gentle, and many other things. The type of man I wish I could have met so long ago now.
            “Thanks…I could not stand there…” I replied.
            “May I ask a question?” he asked cautiously.
            “I suppose…” I responded in kind.
            “I know I feed a similar way and I have my reasons for that. However, I would like to know your reasons.”
            I paused before answering and looked down to the ground as I thought about that for a moment. No one had ever asked me before and I really wanted to pull my words together.
            “I choose this way…because I do not want to be like Jared and the others. They do not care whose lives they take away. They will take because they believe they deserve it. It does not bother them if the people they kill have lives, families, children, or dreams and passions. I believe it should matter. People should matter. I know I have to feed to live. That is my curse now. I choose people who do not have someone that is dependant on them to survive. Someone that will never have a way out of where they are. Even then, I can not bring myself to keep them alive while I feed. It bothers something…deep inside of me to feel them die. To hear their heart slowing and their last breath. I give them the death I would prefer. A quick one before they even know what was going on. Painless. I do want them to be afraid or in pain even for the sake of my life.”
            After finishing this long speech, I realized it was the most I had said…ever. To anyone. I looked back up to him and he seemed almost happy to hear me talk.
            “What?” I asked.
            “You have a good heart,” he replied.
            “I suppose.”
            “Do you mind…telling me how you ended up with this guy?”
            I managed a shrug. “I suppose. In the short version, he found me…after breaking into the house I was residing in with his group. He decided that by the circumstances I was in…that I would and could end up wanting the same things he did. That night he took me and made me a vampire. I was with them ever since.”
            “What do you mean by that?”
            “Do you remember when I told you that even if we both lived in the same year that we would never have met?”
            “Yes, I do.”
            “It was only partially because of my race. It was my nationality that gave me the only job I could find as I had no prospects for marriage. Even after the Civil War, some of the large plantation homes managed to survive and they still needed servants to run them. I helped take care of the cleaning, the children when they were young, and other chores. Only when my father was alive to stand for me would I ever been seen in public or by guests. When he died it all changed. I was lucky to see anyone outside of the house or to even leave the house myself. I did not even have my own room really unless you count a makeshift room being created out of the storage space under the main stair case.
            “Jared and his group broke their way into the house one night when I was twenty one. I hid in my room praying they would not find me. I thought they were merely deserters from the Spanish American War that was still raging. When I kept hearing screams and not a shot fired I knew something was different. I listened as they killed everyone in that house. They ransacked the place and looked for anyone that was hiding. Jared found me hiding and determined that like he I would want revenge. That I would somehow want to take out whatever anger that was brought on by those that had been oppressing me all my life. He believed I would want power and money. That, if he turned me, I would work with him and never be something weak and helpless again.”
            Jasper sighed as he looked around a moment before looking back to me.
            “Then, he never really talked and learned about you did he?”
            I shook my head.
            “Have you thought about my offer?”
            Slowly, I nodded my head. “Yes…I have.”
            “And…?”
            Even as I started to speak, I felt myself starting to fall apart inside. So much so that I had to close my mouth and try and refocus myself. There was nothing more I wanted than to leave. My mind had visions of the things I could do if I was truly free. However, I was still terrified of Jared. I knew the things he could do and they had shaken me to my core. It was what he wanted all along.
            I flinched as I felt a hand on my shoulder. My mind was jerked away from its morbid thoughts as I looked up to the owner of the hand. I was relieved it was Jasper but embarrassed that I had been afraid.
            “It is all right Nicole. You do not have to be afraid. I can protect you and take you away from here,” Jasper said with that oh so soothing voice.
            Simply to hear my real name spoken again was a pleasure. I had missed hearing it. It did far more to help release the tension in my body than anything else he could have said or done.
            “Jasper…I want to leave. You have no idea how much. Well, maybe you do but… I am scared. I do not even know how I would be able to do things on my own. I have never done things on my own ever,” I replied.
            Jasper softly smiled to me. “I can help you get started. There is a supply train that travels from here to Philadelphia. Once there, I have the money to give you so that you can buy all new clothes and move where ever you wish. You will be able to go where ever you choose even if that means overseas. I would help make those arrangements if you wished.”
            “You…you would?”
            “Yes, I would. You deserve the chance and if I can make that happen I will do everything in my power to see you free and happy.”
            His gentle hand was still on my shoulder. Despite the fact he bore the same crimson eyes as Jared, his were filled with compassion and gentleness. A feature that I had only ever seen from my parents.
            I was about to reply to Jasper when a figure dropped down near us in the alleyway. Jasper saw her the same time I did and put himself in front of me to protect me.
            “I will not let you take her if it is her wish to be free from this life,” Jasper spoke boldly.
            I heard Virginia’s voice coming from in front of Jasper. She laughed. She actually laughed.
            “Oh, silly boy. I have not come to take her back,” Virginia replied.
            Jasper tensed at those words and I had to admit I was worried as well.
            “Then, what do you want?” Jasper asked.
            “To give her something,” Virginia replied simply.
            Jasper stood there in front of me for a short while. I was not sure what he was thinking but he slowly stepped aside but not completely out of the way. I suppose he was still showing that he would protect me from her.
            Slowly, I looked over to Virginia. She tossed a small bag towards me. I caught it easily and felt the familiar weight inside. The feeling of it confused me so I opened it. I had been right.
Inside the bag were the daggers I used when I went to kill for Jared as well as the means to wear them.
I looked back up to Virginia in shock.
“You are helping me?” I asked.
“I’m not. I told you. I want Jared for myself. That will never happen with you around. If I killed you then he would kill me. The only way for me to have Jared to myself again is to get you out of the way. If he never finds you, then things can go back to the way they were,” Virginia replied. “Jared is at a meeting with the others for the next couple of hours. If you leave now, you have a chance.”
I looked up to Jasper and he looked down to me. Then, we both looked back at Virginia.
“Thank you…” I replied.
“Don’t thank me yet. I will still have to tell Jared you escaped. He will come after you. My advice, get lost as quickly as you can,” Virginia leapt up and took off with those final words.
Jasper turned and looked to me. “Looks like you have a chance now.” He held his hand out to me with a smile on his face.
This was my one chance. I quickly set to strapping the daggers onto my body. They would be the best thing I had for defense. Once I was done, I looked to Jasper’s hand for a moment before placing my hand into his.
An hour later, we had crept upon a car of the freight train and heading to Philadelphia. Jasper stayed with me the whole time, just as he promised.
Once we arrived, Jasper hurried me along to a man he knew that took care of his finances. He did not seem at all pleased to be woken up at the early hour however Jasper quickly persuaded him out of his tiredness.
The next choices became mine. Where did I want to go? Where could I hide? Eventually, I settled on another train ride that would take me South. From there, I could travel on foot to where ever I wanted. However, boarding that very train was the hardest thing I had to do. To watch Jasper’s face as it faded into the distance. The man that had helped me fine my freedom.
He was the first man that had ever empowered me to find my own way in life. It was him who made me realize I had to take my life into my own hands and make of it what I could. For the first time in the forty-two years since I had be born and become a vampire, I had a say in my own life.